A Once In-a-Lifetime Booboo

We absolutely, positively could not believe we had missed our flight – my niece and I.  We had arrived at the airport two hours early. Yes, two full hours. We nonchalantly bypassed kiosks with our clever Early Bird Check-In and our smart carry-on luggage. We sailed through inspection. (They did not confiscate the two Blueberry Scones I’d saved from Sunday Brunch.) We checked the monitor for our gate: B13. Then, inexplicably, don’t ask me why…we took seats at B14/15!!!

We started gabbing and drinking coffee and laughing at each other’s jokes. Finally, we paused and looked at each other with narrowed, worried eyes. We heard our respective internal alarm clocks ringing. OMG!!! Our flight (over at Gate B13) had already departed!!! This was a once-in-a-lifetime booboo.

Reality is temporarily suspended at a time like this. “No, we didn’t.” “But yes, we did.” We really did miss our plane. What the hell happened? Now we’re immediately dashing toward the airline desk to fix an unimaginable mistake that we don’t yet even believe is real. Without hesitating, we gratefully agree to an alternative itinerary. Yes maam, we will fly stand-by. Yes maam, we will take four flights instead of two. Yes maam, we will arrive at our destination at 11:40 pm instead of 3:30 pm.

As instructed, we run to Gate B4 only to stand there looking pathetic and hoping that at least two passengers don’t show up. We look up and notice both of our names posted intermittently on a public board suspended from the ceiling. [Like, “Look everyone. These are the women who arrived early, sat at the wrong gate, and yakked right past their flight time.”] We, my niece and I, are still incredulous. We are chagrinned and humbled by our combined stupidity. We try to soften the blow to…what? our egos? We envision worse case scenarios to feel comparatively better. (“Well, at least we don’t have to go back home.” “Yeah, at least we don’t have to spend the night in the airport.”)

We agree that we will survive this major gaffe, but we expect that her three brothers (my nephews) will add it to the collection of great family stories. It will be told and retold every Thanksgiving. [At the right moment, one of them will seize a pregnant pause in the dinnertime conversation: “So Christina and Julie…haha…tell us again (guffaw) how you missed your flight…(snicker).”]

Sitting there, anxiously hoping for two no-shows on our potential re-routed flight, I send a quick email updating everyone on our

embarrassing situation. My husband replies quickly; he is just glad that we are safe. I am glad that he doesn’t berate us for our obvious foolishness. He offers words of encouragement to just carry on. Which we do.

My niece and I thoroughly enjoy the remainder of our 12-day vacation. Our family bond is strengthened by our complementary abilities to persevere through an actual show-stopper. We have mutual respect. We have lifelong love. It doesn’t get any better than that.

Julie Helms